I get a lot of questions asked of me, especially when it comes to how I get tasks done. It’s not because I’m lazy, or disorganized; but that must be what people see when they walk into my room — especially when they see a huge pile of laundry on the dorm’s second bed, the one that was supposed to have a roommate in it.
The perceived dysfunction that others see is…false. In fact, this ‘dysfunction’ is actually meant to go against another dysfunction — executive dysfunction.
Executive dysfunction is….well…I don’t quite know how to explain it in a precise way, so I’ll keep it short and sweet. Executive dysfunction affects your prioritizing, decision-making skills, and oftentimes (for me at least) it affects how I actually perform tasks, anything from laundry to college exams to finding a job.
As the name suggests, that means things can get messy and incoherent. Neurodivergent individuals solve this issue in very different ways. The problem is that, in a neurotypical-oriented world, the majority of neurotypical people see the way we behave as lazy, belligerent, or even manipulative.
In my experience, what usually happens is that I get yelled at, and your chances of me doing the thing drops to zero. I see no reason to comply with an ignorant person who spews nothing but inchoate phrases and neurotypically-privileged assumptions at me.
I was planning to do it anyways, but now not only are you borderline bigoted, I cannot actually concentrate on the original task. You’re distracting me too much, and instead to admitting to ignorance you decide to think you’re absolutely right in everything you say, even when I show you evidence concluding otherwise.
Most people have the advantage of not staring at something for an hour, trying to figure out where to start. They don’t have days where they need fifteen instructions, pre-written five days ago, just to figure out how to fold a piece of clothing.
That’s actually what the pile of laundry is for. A lot of people have the luxury of having two huge bins in a house, or at least are able to have an apartment room where they can store their things. I do not, and as I have no roommate now, I figured I could use the other half of the dorm to full advantage.
Clean clothes that have not been folded and put into outfits yet go on the pile. Dirty clothes go into a two small hampers I could bring with me.
I have a set of instructions on my phone that specifically tells me this.
When I ‘m not having as many difficulties that day, I sort the clean clothes into outfits and put them in the dresser. Sometimes I even try the outfit on to make sure I won’t have sensory issues that could pull me into a meltdown later in the day.
That note also has instructions on how many of each kind of article should be in an outfit, how to fold each piece, what order to stack the articles of clothing, which dresser to put them away in, which clothes I can get away with wearing more than once if I need to run to class, and which clothes absolutely cannot go with others when I start having sensory issues.
Please don’t demonize your Neurodivergent friend, relative, or whatever, when they say they’re having difficulty.
That’s only my way of dealing with it. It’s not the best way to do it.
Given how my family forced me to pass as one you, one of you neurotypical people though? I would much rather have an incohate way of solving the problem on my own terms than be forced to mask and face psychological abuse again.